Wednesday, April 22, 2020

Day 33: Qualifying WTF

This article is part of The 100 Days Offensive. Got to Day 32 or Day 34.

"WTF" was once an expression of utter disbelieve. But those days are long gone.

Nowadays the rate of WTF is an everyday expression and used as a quality measurement for code:
But I think a purely quantitative approach to WTF is wrong. We also need qualitative distinction for WTF. In order to achieve this, I tried to find out how other people solved that problem. One distinctive example is Guiseppe Mercalli who tried to differentiate between those earthquakes that you could hardly feel and those which flattened cities and regions. He introduces the Mercalli intensity scale. I like that approach, so I now give you the Martin WTF intensity scale (MWIS):

  • WTF Level I - Not Felt: This is used to utter a disbelief about an event that can only perceived under very favorable circumstances (sensitive and bored person with attention to the topic and close by).

    Example: The press secretary said "President Trump just lied in our press conference" and I so "WTF (Level I)?"
  • WTF Level II - Very weak: The event can be noticed when you are bored and paying attention to the topic or close by.

    Example: She told me that one participant at the Tour de France was caught being doped and I thought to myself  "WTF (Level II)?"
  • WTF Level III - Weak: An not-too-unusual event that can be notice by a bored person with an interest for that topic even at some distance.

    Example: They reported: "We have found out that the CA XXX has issued certificates violating the rules" and I went" WTF (Level III)?".
  • WTF Level IV - Light: The event can be noticed by a bored person that without interest for the topic.

    Example: When he mentioned that Christmas is already next week I remarked "WTF (Level IV)".
  • WTF Level V - Moderate: This is appropriate for a frequent, not unexpected event. You may notice it even when not-bored if you are close by or following the topic.

    Example: And when they caught Senator YYY with his hands in the cookie jar I was like "WTF (Level V)?"
  • WTF Level VI - Strong: This is appropriate for a rare but not unexpected event. You may notice it even when not-bored.

    Example: When they announced  that they would release Star Citizen - Squadron 42 really soon now, it was totally WTF (Level VI) for me.
  • WTF Level VII - Very Strong: An unexpected event, even disinterested people close to the topic or the location can't escape it.

    Example: The St. Louis Cardinals won the Superbowl? WTF (Level VII)?
  • WTF Level VIII - Severe: A very unexpected event, most people cannot escape it, even journalists notice something amiss.

    Example: When George R. R. Martin released the "Winds of Winter" today, every fan just "WTF (Level VIII)?"
  • WTF Level IX - Exciting: The trade press knows no other topics. The first influencers interfere.

    Example: Google, Netflix and Facebook are down! WTF (Level IX)?
  • WTF Level X - Startling: The complete press is focused on the event. Some celebs release nude shots to get some of the remaining attention.

    Example: When they announced that The Walking Dead would be discontinued I really thought "WTF (Level X)?"
  • WTF Level XI - Mind-blowing: The complete world talks about the event.

    Example: They just revived Steve Jobs to present the iPhone 99... WTF (Level XI)?
  • WTF Level XII - Mind-blasting: The events captures all attention. No other topic is talked, reported or noticed.

    Example: PepsiCo just bought The Coca Cola Company! WTF (Level XII)?

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